ammocked blog

The following article will give you some insight into how maternity styles work and to help you decide what styles will best suit your needs.

The sizing of maternity wear is fairly straight forward; it is generally the same size as pre-pregnancy clothing. So if you were a size 14 prior to falling pregnant then this is the size you should choose. Of course as with all things there are exceptions to the rules.

1. If you are pregnant with multiples then it is advised that you go up a size.

2. If you have a tendency in your non-pregnant life to fluctuate between sizes then it would also be advisable to go up a size for later in your pregnancy.

Various styles are on offer in skirts, pants and shorts that cover a wide range of preferences, you will see commonly used terms to describe maternity styles which are as follows:

Under tummy - Obviously as the name suggest this style sits just under your tummy, normally recommended for 2-7 months although many wear them to term with comfort.

Advantages - Your bump can grow with out any restriction, no pressure to be felt on your stomach which can upset some women later in pregnancy.

Disadvantage - No feeling of support, some women feel they need the extra support in front as their tummy expands.

Mid and Over tummy - These styles sit either midway over your abdomen or completely over it. These styles are generally recommended for 2-9 months. There are 3 different designs to this type.

1. Elastic waist - has an elastic waist with extra material in the front.

Advantages - expands naturally as your belly does.

Disadvantages - extra material in front can look a ‘little baggy’ in early pregnancy (although you can spread it out along the elastic).

2. Belly Panel - has a front panel that is made from stretchable fabric.

Advantages - expands naturally as your belly does, tends to give more feeling of support right throughout your pregnancy than your elastic waist style.

Disadvantages - Panel may remain stretched after pregnancy; make sure you buy ones made of high quality.

3. Adjustable elastic - Have adjustable elastic usually on either side and made of stretch material.

Advantages - You select how firm you want this style to sit, also helps post pregnancy as you can return them to the original size. Gives a feeling of support.

Disadvantages - None.

Fold over top - Fold over top is made from stretch material, it gives you the choice of where you want the waist to sit, you can wear them folded down early in your pregnancy and unfold them as your bump grows. These are one of the most popular styles purchased through our store. Recommended for 2-9 months.

Advantages - Gives you extra feeling of support if you feel you need it or you can leave them folded the choice is yours.

Disadvantages - None, although cheap brands may lose some elasticity following pregnancy.

The information supplied in this article is a guide only, individual manufacturers may vary in sizing and styles, please check with your supplier prior to purchase.

Written By Leisa Sanderson

Mother of two. Owner and Operator of Bumps and Bundles - http://www.bumpsandbundles.com.au Online article and resource directory for ‘all things maternal’ and Bump and Bundles Maternity - Online retailer of Maternity baby and toddler wear, and baby gift items. http://www.bumpsandbundles.com.au/b.htm

Technorati tags: styles maternity advantages elastic wear

Ugg fluff momma boots are one of the most unique styles of boots to come off the drawing board in a while. These three-quarter length long-haired boots are stylish yet practical. The mere sight of these boots exudes warmth and comfort. In fact, you should not be surprised if you find that everyone you encounter will want to reach out and touch these luxurious boots. The people you meet will want to know whether the boots are really as soft as they appear to be. And the truth is they are. The striking design of these boots will definitely turn heads whether you wear them around the chicest ski slopes of Europe or while walking through the streets of Los Angeles.

After you have spent an exhausting day skiing down the most difficult slopes you can find, your feet will beg for comfort. Treat your feet right and slip them into a pair of Ugg fluff momma boots. These boots are the perfect Apres ski boot. Pair these genuine sheep skin boots up with your after ski clothes or even your favorite party clothes. Then strut your way down to the most exclusive hot spots the resort area has to offer. You will be able to make a grand entrance without worrying whether or not you will be able to keep your balance. That is because the soles of these boots are slip resistant. The rugged plastic tread design ensures that you will turn heads because of how you look and not because of how you looked as you fell on the ice while approaching the entrance. Once you are inside, in no time at all, the comfortable soles will reenergize your feet and you and your feet will not stop moving around the dance floor.

Even if hitting the slopes is not your idea of fun, you can still own a pair of these one-of-a-kind boots. Ugg fluff momma boots are currently available in three colors: black, off-white and a soft, pastel pink. While not a wide selection of color options, you will find that these color choices will go with just about everything in your closet. Once you start wearing these funky boots, you will see that they will quickly become your footwear of choice. They will be the first thing you grab out of your closet.

Once you put on a pair of ugg fluff momma boots, you will realize that no one will really care what you are wearing for clothes. Everyone you encounter when you wear these unique boots will be staring down at your feet! Pair these outrageous boots up with faded and worn out blue jeans or with your shortest mini skirt. You can wear these boots while out on a date, while shopping at the mall, while on the ski slopes and even while at the beach. Yes that is right. For years, surfers have worn these boots paired up with their swimsuits. So the simple answer to the question of how to wear your ugg fluff momma boots is this: It does not matter how you wear these boots just as long as you wear them everywhere!

Like all sheep skin boots, ugg fluff momma boots are best worn with bare feet. The genuine sheep skin will help moderate the temperature of your feet. Even this style of ugg boot guarantees that your feet will stay warm in colder weather and will cool down as the temperature begins to rise. These boots are trendy, they are unique and they are comfortable. Get a pair to wear today!

Brian Fong http://www.Sheep-Skin-Boots-Guide.com

You can wear these ugg fluff momma boots while out on a date, while shopping at the mall, while on the ski slopes and even while at the beach …

Technorati tags: boots while wear fluff momma

Are Your Lack of Marketing Skills Holding You Back From the Success You Deserve?

Secrets of Success for Women Entrepreneurs Who Would Rather Get a Bikini Wax than Market Their Home-based Business

Does the thought of marketing your business drive you to chocolate? If “getting the word out” makes you feel uncomfortable and overwhelmed, you’re not alone. In my work coaching over 1,000 men and women during the last three years I’ve discovered big differences between men and women and how they handle the challenges that marketing throws at every small business.

WOMEN STILL NOT TAKEN SERIOUSLY IN THE BUSINESS WORLD

Did you know women are starting businesses at four times the rate of men and now employ more people than the Fortune 500 combined? But businesses owned by women are often still not taken seriously. In my forthcoming book, “Testosterone-Free Marketing: Secrets Why ‘Old Boys’ Marketing Doesn’t Work for Women” I discuss why marketing makes many women uneasy and what to do about it. Many women don’t market their businesses pro-actively resulting in less success and less financial freedom.

Did you dream of a life of ease when you started your home-based business only to struggle to cover your bills every month? It happens a lot. Women start a home-based business to have more time with their families and often their income drops dramatically. It doesn’t have to be this way. Effective marketing that works with your style as a woman can help you put more cash in your pocket with less effort.

CAN’T RELATE TO “OLD-BOYS,” “TESTOSTERONE-HEAVY” MARKETING?

One issue for many women is they can’t relate to the guns, cannons and “scorched earth” marketing that are about killing the competition at any cost. Women don’t want to kill anyone. We feel uncomfortable “nailing the sale” when the rest of our lives are about building relationships and extending a hand in friendship. We hate being pushy, manipulative or annoying. So we often wait for others to initiate a purchase from us. This is especially true for women raised to be “good girls” and not “toot their own horn.”

TALENTED WOMEN WAITING AT THE CROSSROADS OF SUCCESS

Katherine has been struggling for two years getting her online business started. She offers a package of services and information to help other online entrepreneurs bring more traffic to their websites. Her digitally delivered information product provide an amazing array of time-saving tips, ideas, strategies, software and more that’s easy to use and can help build website traffic fast. But her website is a confusing hodge-podge. There is no focal point. Nothing leads visitors to believe the information is provided by an expert or authority. Katherine feels uncomfortable calling herself an expert. Because her site is loaded with so many free items the only people who visit are people looking for freebies not serious shoppers who intend to buy. The result: she works hard and wonders when the floodgates will open.

Lana is a virtual assistant. She’s bright, talented and computer-savvy. Her business is based on billable hours. Last week she got a new client, but he told her he couldn’t afford her hourly rate. Lana cut her fees because she couldn’t stop thinking about how she was going to pay the rent on her apartment. If Lana built up her value with marketing instead of cutting rates she would attract clients willing to pay her full price without discounting or devaluing her skills. Like many women, Lana is uncomfortable reaching out to others with her message. Consequently she works for less than what the market says her skills are worth.

NURTURING WOMEN CAN HAVE ABUNDANT CASH FLOW, TOO

What’s going on? Women often bring to their home-based businesses the same nesting, nurturing characteristics they are used to at home. They also bring the skills and expertise they have around their product or service. Business has no gender but people do. Marketing is often out of their comfort zone. But it’s the skill needed to create abundant cash flow even if we don’t do it the same way as men.

Since a home-based business doesn’t have a sign to draw people in like a retail store, other means must be used to attract customers or clients. Without this focus your business will be out of balance and unprofitable.

THE SECRETS OF ASKING AND RECEIVING IN THE BUSINESS WORLD

“It never hurts to ask!” goes a saying you’re likely to hear from a man with a raised eyebrow and a grin. The masculine aggressor role of making the first move is taking place when a man says these words.

“I shouldn’t have to ask!” a woman says with a sigh. Every man has shaken his head in frustration at these words. Expecting others to read your mind is risky especially in business. Consider the percentages of men and women who fit in the categories below:

Men are about “Fortune” magazine; women are about “Working Mom”.

Men are about Tom Clampett novels; women are about Danielle Steele

Men are about Dave Letterman; women are about Oprah Winfrey

Men are about Home Depot, women are about Nordstrom’s

Men want new tools for Christmas, women want a new fragrance

Women are about being mysterious and then slowly saying yes.

Men are about asking and women are about receiving.

According to a study by the American Association of University Women, girls get quieter in sixth grade and drop to minimum levels of class participation in seventh and eighth grades. It could be we pick up the message earlier; learning that saying, “I want” or “I need” seems unladylike and unattractive.

WAITING FOR BUSINESS TO COME TO YOU: YES OR NO?

Love it or hate it, marketing is about asking for what you want. And while in personal relationships it’s still often wise counsel to wait for others to call you, in business it is silly. We can’t wait for customers the way we waited for the cute boy who sat next to us in High School History Class to call for a date. Business will come to us, when we let the world know we are here, we are competent and we are ready.

GAINING THE TOOLS TO SUCCEED IN YOUR BUSINESS YOUR WAY

Happily, while writing my book, men have consistently been my greatest cheerleaders. Some industries are still testosterone-driven but many of the ‘dinosaurs’ holding women back have retired and moved on. I have seen the enemy and she is us.

Women entrepreneurs thrive when we are supported and offered solutions. My teleclasses will help you understand yourself as a woman and provide foundational marketing strategies to help you succeed in ways that are peaceful, friendly and allow you to relax and be yourself rather than dodge bullets. When you learn these keys your cash flow soars and your self-esteem grows, too.

About The Author

With over two decades of successful experience in sales, advertising, public relations, market research and planning, Denise Michaels has worked with top authors and seminar leaders. She also has a keen grasp on the Mars-Venus differences between men and women and how those differences impact us in marketing and selling. Michaels is a marketing mentor for women home-based business owners who want to take their business to the next level and author of the popular book, “Testosterone-Free Marketing.” Discover more about Denise online at http://www.MentoringwithDenise.com or http://www.tfmbook.com or http://www.SalesLetterEbook.com To contact via email: [mailto:smartprotege@msn.com]smartprotege@msn.com

Technorati tags: women business marketing home-based often

During the past decade a new genre of literature has emerged, referred to as ‘Chick Lit’. Undeniably popular with millions of women all over the world, these novels often focus on a main heroine struggling with some aspect of her life. These struggles, whether it be her love life, career and finances, or health and weight, are usually tempered with a sharp sense of humour and insighful sensibility. You can locate them in any bookstore by the bright dust jacket colours, usually pink, and the stylized and cartoonish look to the characters.

Often criticized for being too light and fluffy, there is actually great diversity in the ‘Chick Lit’ genre illustrated by the wide demographics of the readership. Although many of the books tend to follow a formula, there are endless variations on the young, single career woman, anxious to marry and filled with insecurities. Marriage, divorce, infidelity, pregnancy, bankruptcy, depression and even death can be found in these books with varying levels of humour and sensitivity. These books allow the reader an outlet of identification with the main character, and can be cathartic as well as entertaining.

The term ‘Chick Lit’ may be a new one but the type of novel isn’t. Jane Austen is the classic ‘Chick Lit’ author with famous books like Pride and Prejudice, Emma, and, Sense and Sensibility. Pride and Prejudice gave Helen Fielding the plot for Bridget Jones’ Diary, who successfully mirrored early 19th century women’s issues in a modern context. The success of Bridget Jones’ Diary combined with the popularity of TV shows like Sex in the City gave modern women fictional heroines to identify and laugh with. These books are more than finding happiness through a new pair of shoes, or the attention of the right man. It’s about an internal struggle that all women face, but don’t necessarily want to always take that seriously. ‘Chick Lit’ may be considered cotton-candy literature, but it’s a refreshing treat!

The following books are some great ‘Chick Lit’ picks. Enjoy!

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

A classic book turned phenomenon as a result of the BBC production starring Colin Firth. The story has been hijacked most recently in the form of:

Bridget Jones’ Diary by Helen Fielding

It’s a great book, with many women identifying with Bridget’s foibles in life and love. I thought it was hilarious, and the sequel just as funny. The The Edge of Reason is better in book form than movie form, with memorable scenes. Give the book a chance if you didn’t find the movie lived up to the hype.

Shopaholic Series By Sophie Kinsella

Confessions of A Shopaholic, Shopaholic takes Manhattan, Shopaholic Ties the Knot.. Funny books, with a main character I identified with more than I thought I would! If you’re having financial woes, this is a great pick me up.

The Nannie Diaries by Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus

An interesting and sometimes very sad look into how the other half lives and neglects. Not hilarious as the cover reviews lead you to believe, but has it has its funny moments.

Knocked Up: Confessions of a Hip Mother to Be by Rebecca Eckler

It’s a funny and honest look about fears and apprehensions that martini sipping, career women have about becoming a mom. There’s also a reference to naming the baby Apple. I wonder what came first, the book or Gwenyth’s baby?

Belly Laughs: The Naked Truth About Pregnancy and Childbirth by Jenny McCarthy

Blunt, honest, funny and at times sweet. My sister had this book while she was pregnant and gave it to me to read. I now know exactly what to expect!

The Wife of Rielly by Jennifer Coburn

Accounting exec Prudence Malone gets engaged and stuns her friends. She’s already married, and this is a big conundrum. She gets her friends to agree to help her find a more compatible mate for her current husband, which will free her to marry again.
Very funny book, with an interesting premise.

The Art of Undressing by Stephanie Lehmann

Author of the books Are You in the Mood and Thoughts While Having Sex brings us another great read. The Art of Undressing is a very funny and touching book about Ginger Levine, daughter of an ex-exotic dancer who is feeling alienated from her fem side. Great characters and story development.

Jane Arnold is a freelance writer and voracious reader who loves ‘Chick Lit’. Find lots more girly stuff at her website http://www.girlyside.com/girlyside.html

It’s a girl’s guide to health, beauty, love and leisure. Also feel free to sign up for the free newsletter at http://www.girlyside.com/newsletter.html for more articles, tips and advice on a variety of fun topics.

Technorati tags: books book chick women great

Uggboots, the latest fashion trend, are everywhere! It seems you cannot walk by the window display of any clothing or shoe store without seeing in it a pair of these trendy boots. No matter where you are in the world, from Australia to California to all places in between, Ugg boots are there. These boots are hot and they are not just to be worn in cold weather. How many pair of do you own? For many people, one pair is simply not enough.

Uggboots are available in a multitude of sizes, colors, styles and fabric options. And it is no longer necessary to know someone living “down under” in Australia who can hook you up with a pair. Retailers nationwide and around the globe are stocking these best-sellers. It is even possible for you to own a pair without even having to leave the comfort of your own home. There are countless Internet web sites selling this hot item. Of course, once you receive your brand new pair of Ugg boots, you will want to get out of the house and show them off!

Uggboots are made in sizes that will fit every member of the family - infants, children, women and men. Full sizes, half sizes, and all sizes in between are available, if you are willing to spend the time looking. But don’t worry; it will not take long to find the perfect size. What may be difficult is picking out the perfect color.

Chestnut, black, lilac, blue, pink, brown and natural sand are just a few of the many different color options that you can find for Uggboots. In fact, these trendy boots are so fashionable that you will want to purchase several pairs in different colors. Imagine owning different colored Uggboots to wear to match your different moods. Red is sure to be an attention-getter. Natural colors give the wearer that casual look. Pink is perfect for that flirty, girly look. And classic black is a color that is sure to go with everything. Uggboots are available in a variety of fashionable styles. You can purchase tall Uggboots or short. If you are unable to decide between tall or short, you can split the difference and get the three-quarter boot length. And if wearing the popular boot by day is not enough for you, they are even available in a slipper style. The latest style to hit the market is a clog style. And more styles are arriving every day.

And there are more. The tall Uggboot style can be found with additional fleece detail on the outside , making this style the ultimate in femininity. When practicality is more important than looks, Uggboots are available with a tough molded sole and additional reinforcement in the heel and toe area. This style is great for wearing in slippery areas where traction and resistance can help the wearer avoid potentially dangerous falls.

And the exterior look does not end with color or with sheepskin. These boots are also available in your choice of suede or leather on the outside. A high-quality Uggboot will be lined with pure Australian merino sheepskin, but imitation fabrics abound. Zippers and straps and elasticized sides are just a few of the other options that will change the look of this must-have boot.

Big, clunky soles or smooth soles, tumbled leather or milky-smooth leather, real sheepskin or an imitation, short, tall, or somewhere in between, Uggboots are the “in” thing to have in your closet this season. And you’re sure to find a pair that fits your budget.

Brian Fong http://www.Sheep-Skin-Boots-Guide.com

Uggboots are available in a variety of fashionable styles. You can purchase tall Uggboots or short. The latest style to hit the market is a clog style. And there are more …

Technorati tags: uggboots available pair boots sizes

Everybody on TV seems to be tumbling into bed on the first date these days, but should
you? Absolutely not, and I don’t care if you’ve been celibate since
1996.

Here’s why:

1. Chances are, you’ve just met the guy. You know nothing about him,
let alone whether he bathes daily, or if he’s one of those losers who
picks his nose at stoplights.

2. My OB/GYN estimates that two out of five people are walking around with
Herpes Simplex II. Some of them don’t even know it. Do you want to become one of the two out of five?

3. If you have sex with a guy on a first date, how do you know that he
doesn’t leap into the sack with every other woman he meets? Do you really want to

get involved with someone that easy? He doesn’t make quality boyfriend or husband material.

All right then, how about third-date sex?

You may really be ripe for action, but I still advocate waiting. You
can learn a lot more about a man (without clouding your judgment) if
you keep sex out of the equation until the time is right. And waiting
builds passion!

You’re less likely to have bad sex with a man you’ve taken your time
with than with some clown you hit the sheets with too soon.

Of course, you risk being dumped if you don’t hop into bed right away
with certain guys. But think about it: Wouldn’t you rather be dumped
than be saddled with someone who’s so utterly superficial and
self-involved?

You deserve better.

Terry Hernon MacDonald is the author of “How to Attract and Marry the Man of Your Dreams.” Visit her website at http://www.marrysmart.com

Technorati tags: into dont youve know first

As a guest on a local television show recently, I decided to bring along my vacuum cleaner.

No, it wasn’t for a segment on household hints. I wasn’t there to share secrets for deep-cleaning a carpet. Instead, I was using my vacuum cleaner as a memorable visual (aural?) aid to talk about mindfulness.

My host, Roland, gamely turned it on during my bit, and we attempted to shout over the roar of the machine. After a few seconds, we gave up, and as he turned it off, the ensuing silence was a welcome relief.

I used the vacuum cleaner to talk about how we have this noise in our heads all the time. Our thoughts are creating a swirl of sound, and it can be exhausting to try to concentrate, relax or get creative with all that racket going on.

This mental vacuum sucks our energy and makes it difficult to gain clarity, let alone peace of mind. We need to turn it off in order to have the quiet space we need to truly pay attention.

The surprising part of this is that turning on a REAL vacuum cleaner and running it across your floor provides an excellent opportunity to quiet the noise in your head. You can use your power switch to make an intentional shift toward mindfulness, and let this housecleaning task become your chance to watch your thoughts.

Any slow repetitive physical task lends itself beautifully to mindfulness practice, and the back-and-forth motion of your vacuuming can give a soothing rhythm to your thought-watching. Set your body on auto-pilot and focus on the thought parade in your head.

Or, you can choose to use your dust-sucking time to focus on the physical activity required. Feel the muscles as you move. Focus on your shoulders and arms as you stretch and retract, stretch and retract. Switch arms and watch how it feels to relax that one side while flexing the other.

The point here is to make use of the task as a trigger for mindfulness, but remember this: fun is a huge motivator in all things. So, if you can’t get too excited about vacuuming in general or thought/body-watching in particular, I heartily recommend Option #3–the “Mrs. Doubtfire” approach to mindfulness.

You remember the scene in the movie, Mrs. Doubtfire, when Robin Williams, dressed as the matronly nanny, rocks out while vacuuming to Aerosmith’s “(Dude) Looks Like A Lady,” right? This must be the greatest housework scene ever. It makes me want to go to my cleaning closet and dance with the vacuum wand myself.

That’s what I’m talking about.

If you’ve ever been stressed about something and gone on a cleaning binge, you know how good it feels to scrub the floor and wipe away your frustration at the same time. You might as well get something done while you’ve got that adrenaline pumping, right?

So, if a meditative vacuuming session doesn’t inspire you, you can still use this time to be mindful by focusing on your air guitar moves. Pay attention to your sense of fun as well as your sense of perspective. Exercise your concentration. Focus on what it feels like to cut a rug while cleaning it.

Mindfulness doesn’t require stillness, and it certainly doesn’t have to be serious. Turn on your vacuum, and let the focusing begin.

Suck it up.

Maya Talisman Frost is a mind masseuse in Portland, Oregon. Through her company, Real-World Mindfulness Training, she teaches eyes-wide-open ways to get calm, clear and creative. To subscribe to her free weekly ezine, the Friday Mind Massage, please visit http://www.MassageYourMind.com.

Technorati tags: vacuum mindfulness vacuuming focus while

Before the discussion of how to choose cheap ugg boots can begin, it will be important to first define the word, cheap. If the definition of the word cheap means inexpensive, then this discussion will go off in one direction. If, however, the definition of the word cheap is to mean made from lower-quality materials which will then lower the price of this style of boot, then the discussion will cover the subject of imitation brands of boot. This article will attempt to cover both definitions, starting with the former.

Cheap ugg boots can be found if you are willing to take the time necessary to look for them. Because the look and feel of ugg boots is very popular right now, finding places selling them for less than full retail price will be a difficult and time-consuming task. Add to this the fact that it currently is prime boot selling season and the difficulty of the task is compounded. If you simply have to have a pair of ugg boots right now, the only things you can really do are search for stores offering sales on these items or search the Internet for outlets offering discounted prices. Check out the special deals on cheap ugg boots here.

Stores, whether they are actual physical locations or on-line stores, likely will not be holding very many sales until the holiday shopping season is in full swing. What that means is that right now, cheap ugg boots may be difficult to find. In a few weeks, especially if stores are not reaching their sales quotas, you likely will see more and more incentives and offers to entice shoppers to open their wallets and spend some money. Again, retailers are savvy and whether or not they actually put this style of boot on sale is something that cannot be predicted. Plus, waiting for these boots to go on sale might cause another problem for you. If sales of these boots are brisk, you might find that when you are finally ready to make your purchase, stores could be out of stock on this popular item. If you do happen to find a pair on the Internet, make sure you have a clear and verifiable shipping date available before you finalize your purchase.

Another potential Internet source for cheap ugg boots are the various auction-type web sites. Enter the style and color you desire and your size into the search engine to see if anyone has a pair being auctioned off. Of course, if you find a pair, and the price on the starting bid is right, that does not mean the boots are yours. You will have to wait until the bid period expires until you will know for sure whether or not these boots will be arriving on your doorstep. Do not forget to factor in the cost of shipping into your price. You might just end up paying full price after all these issues are dealt with.

Now if you do not care much about getting a boot that is has pure Australian sheep skin on the outside and one hundred percent pure, warm and comfortable wool on the inside, then you should have no trouble finding a pair of imitation, but nonetheless cheap ugg boots. In fact some imitation brands look so good that other people may not ever know that your boots are fakes. Taking this path ensures that you can still appear fashionable without putting a dent in your wallet. Your feet will know the difference, however. They will feel hot and sweaty and they will stink terribly when the boots are removed.

Brian Fong http://www.Sheep-Skin-Boots-Guide.com

Cheap ugg boots can be found if you are willing to take the time necessary to look for them. The only things you can really do are search for stores offering sales on these items or search the …

Technorati tags: boots cheap stores pair search

As soon as Chelsea walked in, she plopped down on the couch and announced, “I am so frustrated.”

“Hello Chelsea,” I said.

Ignoring my greeting altogether, she continued, “No really, Coach, I am.”

A few months earlier, Chelsea, a successful, attractive and very fit thirty-something lawyer, had been involved in a serious quest for a good, long-term relationship. She was in my office explaining how hard it had been to find a man of similar goals and values given her busy lifestyle. I had encouraged her to try online dating. I pointed out that it would be an effective method of connecting with a large number of men that fit her criteria, in the shortest amount of time, with minimal effort.

“Chelsea, please explain,” I replied, taking to her cue to skip the formalities and get right to the point.

“I really did it,” she continued, “I changed my pattern, followed your steps, went online and approached my search with a new set of guidelines. I can tell you, it worked! I found the right guy.”

“And…?”

“Well, Ben is a wonderful man. He’s everything I could have hoped for. We have fun together and can agree on just about everything. He’s already my best friend. I even waited this time and didn’t rush into sex.”

She hesitated. I waited for her to continue.

“That’s where the problem comes up, Coach. I don’t know what to do. Like I said, I’m frustrated…the sex is not so good. It’s terrible because everything else about our relationship is perfect. I can truly see us building a happy life together.” Then, after a pensive pause, “I’m thinking maybe I should just fake it. The sex should get better, right? Isn’t it ok to fake it for now?”

Chelsea is one of countless women who resort to “faking it” to fool their partners into believing they enjoy lovemaking when they actually do not. Why do so many women feel they have to pretend to enjoy sex instead of actually being able to enjoy it?

Some women simply don’t have orgasms and they feel insecure about it. This is usually the result of growing up with a feeling of shame and guilt about sexuality. From a very young age, girls are sent pretty clear messages that discourage them from expressing and/or fully exploring this aspect of themselves. Consequently, many women have to learn that it is good to get in touch with their bodies on an intimate level and learn how to be turned on. Only then can true sexual enjoyment be experienced.

Men contribute to this problem with their own insecurity and lack of a basic understanding of how women function sexually. Since so many men measure their very degree of “maleness” by their sexual prowess, it has become well established that giving a woman an orgasm is a defining element in what we call manhood. The problem is that when a woman cares enough about a man to become intimate with him, she usually cares enough about his ego to feel incredible pressure to make him believe she thoroughly enjoys sex with him. Some woman experiencing the need to please a man’s ego report faking orgasms “just to end the incessant pounding.”

Men should understand that every sexual encounter will not lead to her having an orgasm, and that it is ok. Not having an orgasm does not mean she did not find the experience pleasurable. Relieving her of this pressure will allow her to become more relaxed and more receptive, thus leading to more orgasms!

I know most men would never admit it publicly, but many could benefit from learning more about how to please women. It is probably a good idea to start by letting go of the notion that the only way a woman can be stimulated to a climax is by way of intercourse. In fact, only about 30% of women can experience orgasm with intercourse alone. That leaves a staggering majority of women who require other forms of stimulation.

I could go on in great detail about this particular issue because it is truly at the heart of so many of these problems. Chelsea’s problems were rooted elsewhere.

Based on her own accounts, Chelsea placed too heavy an importance on creating the “perfect” relationship. She went on and on about what a perfect match she and Ben were. By wanting something so much can create fear and anxiety not allowing you to relax. Nonetheless, Chelsea’s attention became so focused on how perfect their lovemaking should be, that her own natural ability to enjoy the exquisite pleasures of intimacy was severely hampered. To Chelsea, any problem that could taint this otherwise perfect relationship had to be squelched by a quick solution: Fake orgasms. Problem solved. Forgetting that a long-term relationship needs to be built on a solid foundation.

In his 1996 book, Contemporary Interpersonal Theory and Research, Donald Kiesler provided us with a behavior concordance model which explains the Interpersonal Reflex Principle. This basically states that much of our interpersonal behavior is designed to elicit predictable responses from those with whom we interact. These actions put into motion a cycle where one’s behavior is constantly confirming, recognizing, validating and influencing the behavior of others. Sounds complicated but it is not. In essence we are training people what we like and don’t like.

A dog, for example, repeats good behavior rewarded. However, if you reward a dog for unwanted behavior like begging at the table, the dog will repeat that behavior and always beg. To fake an orgasm is to confirm to your partner that what they were doing was good. This creates a positive feeling in your partner and they will do more of the same. Unlike the dog, training your partner to perform this trick will not leave you begging for more.

Trying to break the cycle will confuse your partner creating doubt. Your partner will lose confidence and never know when to trust you, is he pleasing you or not? When this happens sex will only get worse and the relationship strained.

“To answer the question should women fake it? No! Never fake it.”

Problems, as much as we would like them to, do not just go away. The longer you go without confronting and handling them, the bigger they become. Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the leading causes of couples splitting up. The number one reason for sexual dissatisfaction is lack of communication. Forgoing communication and opting to simply fake it will only widen the gap between you two and ultimately ruin the relationship.

It is vital that you develop a level of communication with your partner that allows for frank and honest about sex talk. But, how do you tell your partner what turns you on? First set the ground rules between yourselves that sex talk is healthy, fun and in no way to be taken in an offensive manner, then:

Talk during sex. Don’t be afraid of hurting your partner’s ego by taking the time to teach them what brings you the most pleasure. Men in particular are very eager and happy students in this area. Just relax. It is ok to ask, “Do you like this?” or “How does this feel?” By all means, if you are asked such questions, be honest with your answers: “Yes, that feels good.” or, “I liked it when you did this instead” and, “It really turns me on when you do this.” Never ask after sex, “Was it good?” I can tell you that no one likes to be asked this question. File it under the same category as “Do I look fat in this?”

Talk about sex when you are not having sex. Ask questions and keep learning more about each other. Tell each other your fantasies and be willing to explore them, within reason. Opening and maintaining these communication lines will make you both more comfortable about the subject. Talking can also serve to build excitement as prolonged foreplay.

Buy books and explore together. Here is another peculiar aspect. We want sex, think about sex and are bombarded with it all over television, movies and advertisements. Oddly, very few of us study anything about it. A man will invest an exorbitant amount of time learning the parts of an engine or memorizing sports stats, but spends zero time learning about the female orgasm. Both women and men should take every opportunity to become students of sex together. Not only is it very sexy to learn together, you will both benefit from it greatly in the long run.

If you are in a relationship, starting a new one, or looking to get into one, learn that ultimately communication is the key to building a healthy and enjoyable sex life together. Let us do away with this notion that it is somehow wrong or shameful to talk openly about sex or that you can offend each other. I find it interesting that couples can be intimate with each other, yet feel uncomfortable discussing the intimacy. So, talk, learn, teach and, most importantly, have fun!

Learning how to establish a healthy sexual relationship.
(Black Leather Couch Tales)

About the Author:

Devlyn Steele (”America’s Leading Life-Coach”) is a Relationship Coach, Life Coach, Columnist as well as Radio Host. Devlyn has also developed http://www.ToolsToLife.com.

As a Relationship-Coach Devlyn has created the http://www.OnlineDatingKit.com which teaches Internet daters the skills they need to find their perfect matches on their own and offers a complementary e-book at no cost on “How To Choose The Right Dating Site For You.”

Technorati tags: women partner chelsea fake behavior

If you find yourself caught up in the recent boot craze, but think that these trendy boots are way out of touch with your wallet, there is something that you should know. Ugg boots, those oh-so-soft multi-hued boots made from pure Australian sheep skin are available at a discount, if you know where to look. The best place to begin checking for discount ugg boots is on the Internet. The Internet is a wonderful invention. With a good search engine and a few clicks of a button, you can locate just about anything on the Internet, even long-lost distant relatives you had hoped you would never see again. Just begin your search for discount ugg boots by typing an appropriate phrase into the search area. Faster than you can blink an eye, your computer screen will fill with pages upon pages of links you can click to start your search for your very own pair of these trendy boots. If you are looking for discount ugg boots have a look at the great deals here.

The most obvious place to begin your search for discount ugg boots, even without using a search engine, is to visit your favorite web auction site. There you can search for boots, or more specifically, ugg boots, or even more specifically, three-quarter length, tan ugg boots in size seven. Press a button, find a pair that matches your criteria and start naming your price. Before you know it, you will have at your doorstep your very own pair of size seven, tan, three-quarter length ugg boots. See that was not so hard!

Also available on the Internet are different types of shopping mall clubs which you can join by paying the stated membership fee. These types of clubs offer members the ability to purchase various items including clothing, home accessories and other consumables that are available through the particular virtual shopping mall program at a discount. The product lines that these types of virtual shopping malls carry typically include the types of items that one would expect to find in a normal shopping mall environment. So, search around for a shopping mall program which offers discount ugg boots, join the program, and shop around until you find the perfect pair. Who knows, you may just get hooked on the virtual shopping mall experience. Most credit cards are accepted!

The reality is that because this style of boot is just so popular and the product seems to literally fly off the shelf, discount ugg boots may be difficult to locate, even on the Internet. From a retailer’s point of view, it does not make good financial sense to discount the price of a product that is easily and continuously selling at full retail price. With the fall season in full swing and the holiday season right around the corner, this style of boot likely will continue its brisk selling pace making discounts difficult to locate.

Eventually, however, stores will begin to discount their prices in an effort to draw consumers into their stores and encourage them to make purchases. If you are patient and are willing to take time to research the Internet and other retail outlets, you will eventually be able to find a pair of discount ugg boots that fit your needs, and your feet and won’t cause too much damage to your wallet.

Just be aware that the market is quickly flooding with lower quality imitations of this boot style. You may find that some discount ugg boots are not made from pure Australian sheep skin. These boots will likely look pretty close to the real thing, but your feet will know the difference.

Brian Fong http://www.Sheep-Skin-Boots-Guide.com

If you are patient and are willing to take time to research the Internet and other retail outlets, you will eventually be able to find a pair of discount ugg boots that fit your needs …

Technorati tags: boots discount search shopping internet